“From the dream archive” is always a dream or a consciousness experience that I experienced many years ago that left a huge impression. I would like to remind you that these interesting dreams are not part of the past, and readers can always read them whenever they want.
Thursday, April 2, 1998
The following dream was an impressive and memorable experience. It was simple, but also intense, confusing, unforgettable and irritating:
I went to bed very late. When I was comfortable, I arrived very quickly in the land of dreams. When I awoke within the dream, I saw that I was in a strange house. Since I was very aware, I looked out of the window, to sea were I was exactly. I was on the first floor. Outside I saw a small lake, forest, and much greenery. I could not see other houses. When I stepped across the floor, he creaked. It consisted of wooden boards. So the house seemed to be really old and maybe completely made out of wood. I was not sure. Presently I was in a bedroom.
Actually, this room consisted only of a bed, which stood in the corner of the room and a small table with a chair in front of it. There was a wooden chest under the window. I decided to leave the room and to look around in the other rooms. On the level of the first floor I recognized several doors. I ignored them and went back downstairs. Once there I found a large living room, a kitchen and some other rooms. It was a beautiful house.
So I opened the front door and went outside. There I discovered a porch and a small staircase, on which an elderly man sat.
“There you are, how was the night?” he greeted me.
At first I was a bit confused, because he asked me this question, like I had slept here, and as if we would know each other for quite a long time.
“Where am I here?” I asked.
“Oh, you’ve forgotten everything again,” he said resigned. “We should give you some more of the leaves I collected for you.”
I didn’t remember any leaves and that he gave me some of those, but something in my mind told me against taking them. It seemed as if something in my subconscious mind might be reminiscent of such things. He got up and vanished in the house. As a matter of fact.
“I’ve got everything, we can get started right away,” he said dryly and determined.
“No, thank you, maybe later,” I replied.
I felt a dull feeling in my stomach, which threatened to turn more and more into panic. He was frightening me with this suggestion. It seemed to me that he was working with drugs and wanted to extinguish or manipulate me. I can not get him out of the way. He looked at me briefly, then put the bowl on the porch and suggested that I go for a walk in the forest.
We walked around for a while, and he explained to me that my memory was always misfiring, and I was not able to remember where I had just been. Moreover, I would even forget him and the others.
“What others?” I asked puzzled.
“You see, I said,” he replied, laughing. “You’re really a problem. You’ve forgotten everything once again, and you’re acting on me as if you were here for the first time!”
“Am I not here for the first time? “I wanted to know.
“Of course not! You’ve been living here for years. You have lived in another world before, but this was not your real reality. You have done senseless things all day and thought it was your real world. Again and again, you slide into this other world, but fortunately you also keep growing up here. So I can remind you where you belong! You live here! For a long time.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about I’m sorry!” I admitted honestly.
“This will be different this time! In the next days, we will help you remember everything and then you will stay here! You’ll see that you’re really at home here. You belong to that place with us!”
I felt a bit queasy at the thought of having to stay here in this reality – perhaps even forever. Who knows who he and his friends really were. Maybe they were all working together and had agreed to keep me here.
“I will train you further, as before. As long as you have your consciousness shifts and uncontrolled excursions under control. Then you can better anchern and do not always slip off.”
I nodded absentmindedly. I felt the urge to get out of this strange reality, but then I decided to stay a bit longer. What should happen? More than to waking up in my familiar bed could not happen!
After our conversation we went for a meal. There I met two women and a man who also lived in the house. The man liked to talk about his excursions into nature and animals. The two women were not talking that much. One of the women watched me whenever I did not look at her. I felt her eyes rest upon me. In a way, I found her very attractive and could not explain it.
Later, after the meal, I went upstairs to look at the bedroom again. The woman who had been watching me followed me. There was a ceiling light in the room. She stood underneath and looked at me prompted:
“Watch out!” She said, put her head in the neck and turned quickly under the lamp in the circle. The floor cracked under her feet and then she stretched out her hands like she were calling me to grab her and turn me with her. When I caught her hands, she pulled me with an amazing force and I had to be careful not to stumble. I was not dizzy, but I felt she had destabilized my perception. It was almost like she felt it:
“Be careful not to lose your focus. Stay here, even if you now can’t really fix or watch anything. Stay!” she whispered as we turned and turned. We met and in the next few days always in the bedroom and she had the most crazy exercises to train me, not to lose the perception or let me snatch. I knew about the other two roommates, but I can not remember the conversations with them. Even the conversations with the owner of the house and the woman, with whom I often met, I could only recollect poorly.
One day in this bedroom, the woman said to me that I should imitate her movements. So she ran through the room and I kept walking in her footsteps. It was crazy, because she moved faster and I really had trouble following her. It seemed to me like she was dancing and I was not a gifted dancer. She was doing something different, but I do not know what it was. Anyway, the result of this evening was that I entered a higher and more crystal-clear state of consciousness in which I could overlook my life without disguising. It was all so easy! I can not express it, but everything we do, think and want is so easy to see and recognize. Our mind was only the problem, because it thinks too complicated – this word ‘complicated ‘ was a triviality that could not express this complexity. It was very impressive.
I recognized everything about myself and my life. I perceived the whole room as a familiar bedroom, but at the same time I got a kind of holographic picture of it. And everything I then directed my attention to, I could look at with two kinds of eyes, once like I was used to, and then again as a holographic picture. Then I concentrated on distant places and people, at least I tested everything with this double-light, which I just remembered.
I then realized that, for example, scientists are always only researching and inventing devices that have produced the desired effect rather inaccurately. They rehearsed, presumed, theorized… The summary of the whole was, as I could clearly see, that our complete thinking system and our society is not based on the reality in which we are!
This sounds crazy and is not easy to describe, but it seemed to me that the self-image of a human was in a different reality from that in which it was physically present. I thought of children who always thought that they were Superman, Hulk, or a brand-wielding cowboy hero from the Wild West, as they surrounded and chased each other, firmly convinced for this moment to be the figure. This has formed their self-image, their future wishes and expectations…
Whatever that woman had shown me in this room, it conveyed me to a completely different state of consciousness, in which I could see the world and myself in a very simple way. A lot has happened that evening, but unfortunately I have no more memories. It occurred to me that my everyday reality, from which I once came from, disappeared ever further from my memories.
It was a beautiful life here in the house by the lake. We lived the day, went out with the boat or sat on the jetty, discussing each other, having fun, or testing crazy techniques. More and more this world became my new everyday life. But the next morning the old man came back with his wooden bowl to me and said it was time.
He wanted to show me something and it was important that I would know about it. I was scared, because I did not knew what this would do with me. Maybe it would catapult me into another world where I did not want to be, maybe it would drive me crazy or even kill me… There were so many unpredictable factors in the whole matter. What will happen?
“You can trust me! Now we have to take the final step, ending with that, what we have started. Your have to be able to look deeper…”
We sat outside in a meadow. I leaned my back against a tree as he sat in front of me and crushed a few leaves with a pestle. I felt the fear, and I trembled all over. On the other hand, I did not want to take anything from him, but on the other hand I owed it to the man who let me live here and showed me so much. I did not want to disappoint him either.
“You are now ready for the end of the whole. After all, you have lived here for many days and the finishing touches are still missing. You’ll see what this is all about and why you’re here,” he assured me.
Then he handed me the stirred mush and I was to eat the contents. I took it to myself and it took only a few minutes when the effect began. I got sick and I just wanted to go to bed. So we went into the house and he advised me to put myself in the bed in the bedroom. I laid down. When I was finally laying in bed, I tried to relax. I was dizzy and I was still a bit sick.
Eventually the nausea disappeared and gave way to intense clarity. I was suddenly between waking and sleeping and then I understood it! It suddenly came into my consciousness and it was like I awoke from an endless dream! Then I finally knew what the man wanted to show me! All these experiences in his house by the lake, the encounters with the roommates and the beautiful excursions were memories! Memories that I had to remember, so I would not be surprised if I would wake up in real time in his house and in this bedroom! It was all so simple: the man had helped me to prepare gradually for this great moment, that I would wake up in his house and live from now on in this reality forever. I should remember only those events that had happened before, so that the shock was not too big and I knew why I was awakening in the house by the lake.
When he realized, that I was remembering everything, it was time to leave these memories and to wake up in the presence of my body lying in the bed of my actual bedroom. Now finally it is time! I had been able to recall all these moments, now I knew again from my arrival in the house at the lake and I was ready, to stay forever here! It was clear now, after I remembered, I was able to wake up in my real reality… Now I already felt it as I awoke slowly and full of anticipation in my new world I opened my eyes…
I woke up in my bed in my bedroom within the physical reality! Where I had gone to sleep. This shocked me so much that I almost screamed in fright loudly. I jumped out of the bed and looked around. It was my familiar bedroom and not the house by the lake! I was back in my everyday life…
Slowly the memories came back, as I had laid late in the evening, what I had done the previous day and planned for this new day. I had to admit that I was completely perplexed at the moment! Contrary to all my expectations and memories, experiences and intense moments within this other reality, did I wake up here? I just could not believe it! Why had I landed here? Why not in the reality in which I should have actually woken up?
Then I understood what I had already recognized it in the house on the lake. Our self-image is actually in a different reality than in the one in which we have physically centered as a human being. The self-image of a human has almost nothing to do with everyday reality, even if that sounds strange. That is why all we can do here is only guessing, guessing, and guessing. Nobody hits the correct point or the nail on the head! When I realized this, I knew that our self-image really had nothing to do with reality. It took me hours to get used to the physical reality and to get back into my daily life, and it took me several days to digest my surprise and the extreme change in reality.
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